In a world where you can be anything, being a kind and classy person should be on the top of your list. These traits will not only define your character, but they will open the doors of opportunity for you to live your best life.
Women who embody these traits are women who empower and inspire us to become better versions of ourselves. But what is their secret to the warmth and wisdom they possess? The truth is there is no secret, they live their lives trying to make the world a little bit better than it was before they entered it, and they live their lives according to some simple common sense values and rules.
Living an empowering and positive life requires you to stay away from the negative thoughts that bombard us, to be conscience of our actions towards others, and adopt a more empathic way of seeing the world around you. It also involves learning from the women we aspire to be like and mirroring their actions.
So what little bits of wisdom can we learn from the modern classy empowered woman? Here is a list of the top 12 (in no particular order) things that you can do to be a classy modern empowering woman.
- Stop comparing yourself to other women. Every person you meet has a different background and a different starting point. You can’t compare your situation with someone else if your lives are not the same. The education they have, their culture, their circumstances gives them a completely different playing ground than yours. Instead focus on comparing yourself to you, and focus on making progress in your own way.
- Be grateful. The number one way to be more empowering and more positive is to find the blessings in your current circumstances. Even if life seems unfair and your are struggling, these may be things that others wished they would have. Be grateful for the lessons you learn, be grateful if you have food on your table, for the clothes you have, for the roof over your head. When you are grateful for what you have, you are not focusing on what you don’t have. Empowered women understand gratitude is the key to living a life that feels abundant.
- Limit your complaining. The more you complain, the more you end up seeing the world in a negative light. Analyze what it is that is making you want to complain. Is it a valid reason or is it something that is really not that important in the scope of life. Positive and empowering women understand that life is not perfect and they themselves are not perfect. It’s normal to feel frustrated and not be happy about some things, but constant complaining is not a trait that others admire. Complaining about things that you can’t do anything about or are not willing to do anything to fix or change it is wasted energy. In the words of Elsa, “Just let it go”.
- Respect other people’s opinions. Even if you disagree with someone’s opinion, remember an opinion is just that — an opinion, and not necessarily fact. Empowered and classy women understand in life there are many different ways to look a situation and differences between people are natural. Arguing with or not liking someone who has a different opinion than you doesn’t help in trying to understand another view, or to come up with compromised solutions. If you don’t agree with a differing opinion, it’s OK. As the saying goes, there is no harm in agreeing to disagree. Just learn to not take the opinions of others personally.
- Don’t Judge. Just as it is important to respect another’s opinion, it is equally important not to judge them. You don’t always know what a person is going through, what their background is, or why they have chosen the path they are on. Everyone is fighting a battle and everyone’s life is unique unto its own. The person you may be judging could just be having a bad day, or perhaps were just treated poorly and need some compassion. The next time you start to judge someone, imagine how you would feel if you were being judged. Empowered women don’t judge, they instead support and mentor those who need a break or a second chance.
- Recognize Your Worth. Everybody has value and everybody has been given different talents and skills. Classy, modern empowering women know their worth is based on what they bring to the table and know that everybody brings something worth while to the game. Look at your own worth — the skills you are you blessed with, and what life experiences can you draw from. We all have something to contribute to society — no matter if what you bring plays a small part or the lead role. When you recognize that you are worthy of respect, worthy of love, and worthy of what you work for, your life will start to change.
- Offer Solutions, Not Criticism. Empowered women know that criticizing someone or something is useless unless there is a solution to the problem that is presented along with the critique. Anyone can find fault, do the “Monday morning quarterbacking”, but it takes a wise person to know that finding fault and criticizing without a solution is wasted energy. The next time you are tempted to find fault and criticize someone or some way of doing something, take the time to find a valid solution based on facts or experience. Doing so will show your wisdom and you will be making a difference in the end.
- Be Someone. How often do we find ourselves hearing, “Well, someone should do something about this?”, or perhaps we catch ourselves uttering those words from time to time. Instead of waiting for “someone” to step up and do the right thing, or to volunteer or get involved, remember you can actually be that “someone”. The modern empowered woman knows this truth and that is why they inspire others — they take the lead and do what others are not willing to do.
- Be A Mentor or Find A Mentor. No matter what stage of life a person is in, having a mentor to come along side and guide them through a new chapter is critical when facing new challenges. Throughout our lives we will need many mentors as we navigate the different stages of our lives. One wise women once told me, “Even at my age, and I’m 70, I still find that I am experiencing new things and having someone one who has gone through what I’m now going through makes things easier and gives me hope.” Use your life experience to help mentor someone else. Whether is it mentoring a young adult with navigating their new career, a young mom who needs advice, or a more mature individual who is entering the uncharted waters of the empty nest or retirement, empowering women will find a way to mentor others.
- Show Grace To Others. Even when you don’t feel someone deserves it, showing kindness to others is what sets a classy empowered woman apart from the crowd. Showing grace is important because it goes back to how we want to be treated. It’s easy to rip into someone for them doing something wrong to us, but taking a step back and remembering that they are a human being who makes occasional mistakes, will help remind you that we all deserve a be treated with grace. Answer people with a soft approach, be compassionate, and show understanding.
- Forgive. It is not always easy to forgive, but not forgiving someone leads to many more negative actions. Forgiving is not forgetting, but holding on to the hurt and the betrayal doesn’t allow the healing process to begin. No one can tell you that forgiveness happens over night, but remembering times when we wanted to be forgiven for something we have done, helps to put into perspective why forgiving others is important. Forgiving someone doesn’t mean that what happened or what someone did to you is acceptable, it just means that what you experienced doesn’t have to keep hurting you for years to come. Forgiveness is accepting that you can’t control what happened, and accepting that you have the power not to allow the hurt to control you. Empowered women learn to forgive because they know that forgiveness is the most powerful thing to growth we possess.
- Have Manners. The truest sign of a kind and classy woman is how they treat others. It is their politeness and manners that attract others to them. They show appreciation to others, say please and thank you, clean up after themselves, and lend a hand. They find ways to help others and are courteous to all people, especially to service personnel. Empowered women also know that what goes around, comes around. Politeness and manners will never go out of style.
What would you add to this list? Drop a comment below in the comments section and be sure to “Like”, “Tweet”, “Pin”, “Link”, and share this with other people who aspire to be more kind and empowered.
